Responsibility....
One of my jobs as a parent is to teach my child responsibility. One of the reasons for this is to help her become a productive adult. But how can I do that when society is against me???
Last week Emma left her book at Awana. Which means she didn't have it for a week to practice and work through her verses. As we were getting ready to leave for Awana today, she couldn't find her Awana bag. It is lost in the mess of her room. Well I told her that she was going to have to be responsible for her book without the bag tonight since she couldn't find it.
When we arrived at Awana, she picked up her lost book. But by the time I got there to pick her up.... she had lost it AGAIN! I was pretty frustrated that she had lost it yet again. We asked her leader but she didn't know where it was. We looked around at the various places she had been without avail. Finally we looked at the front table where you can check in and such. They didn't have it either.
But they offered her a new book in the place of her lost one! WHAT?? SERIOUSLY?? First of all I had to pay for the book so why should we get another one for free. Second of all, it is her responsibility to keep track of her book.
I told the lady no but she kept insisting. She wanted Emma to have it so she could still practice her verses.
If we are so willing to so quickly rescue our kids... how are they ever going to learn about responsibility?? Yet when I finally had to tell her no firmly, she gave me a look of horror. How dare I try to teach my child about responsibility!
Now I could understand if it had been a couple of weeks and it didn't turn up. Then we would buy another one... I should say EMMA would buy another one. But not within an hour of losing it!
Why is it that I am the bad parent here???????? Just because I am trying to teach my child responsibility?? What happens when she forgets to wake up for her first day at a new job? Should I stay the night at her house to make sure she gets up in time? What about when she forgets a major report that her boss needs? Oh wait... I should run over to her house to pick it up right???
What kind of parent am I......
(By the way... it was finally found... it was on the podium for the leader to announce that he had a lost book. So does that mean I should blame him for all of this...)
Last week Emma left her book at Awana. Which means she didn't have it for a week to practice and work through her verses. As we were getting ready to leave for Awana today, she couldn't find her Awana bag. It is lost in the mess of her room. Well I told her that she was going to have to be responsible for her book without the bag tonight since she couldn't find it.
When we arrived at Awana, she picked up her lost book. But by the time I got there to pick her up.... she had lost it AGAIN! I was pretty frustrated that she had lost it yet again. We asked her leader but she didn't know where it was. We looked around at the various places she had been without avail. Finally we looked at the front table where you can check in and such. They didn't have it either.
But they offered her a new book in the place of her lost one! WHAT?? SERIOUSLY?? First of all I had to pay for the book so why should we get another one for free. Second of all, it is her responsibility to keep track of her book.
I told the lady no but she kept insisting. She wanted Emma to have it so she could still practice her verses.
If we are so willing to so quickly rescue our kids... how are they ever going to learn about responsibility?? Yet when I finally had to tell her no firmly, she gave me a look of horror. How dare I try to teach my child about responsibility!
Now I could understand if it had been a couple of weeks and it didn't turn up. Then we would buy another one... I should say EMMA would buy another one. But not within an hour of losing it!
Why is it that I am the bad parent here???????? Just because I am trying to teach my child responsibility?? What happens when she forgets to wake up for her first day at a new job? Should I stay the night at her house to make sure she gets up in time? What about when she forgets a major report that her boss needs? Oh wait... I should run over to her house to pick it up right???
What kind of parent am I......
(By the way... it was finally found... it was on the podium for the leader to announce that he had a lost book. So does that mean I should blame him for all of this...)
I think parenting takes place in all continuums of time. We have to figure out the right thing to do in moment of time, and at the same time, remember what we have done that worked or didn't work and what has been going on with that kid recently, but we also have to consider the future and what the implications of what we do might be.
ReplyDeleteObviously just cause we give in and buy the candy bar at the check out stand doesn't mean we will have an obese child with no sense of delayed gratification, but if we remember that we did it yesterday and last week and grandma did it too, then we need to rethink the habit we may be potentiating. I know you do that Michelle - and I applaud you for sticking to your guns when someone challenged you. That is SOO HARD!! And Emma saw the importance of responsiblity in that moment too in you standing up for her.
Way to go Mom!!!
No matter what you do, there is always someone that will have a better way to do what you are doing. They may or may not have ever done what you are doing but they are better at it. Just ask them. In my life, I have met many people who could do a better job then I at what I was doing in both my personal life and my work life. In m most cases however, they had never done what I was doing at the time.
ReplyDeleteAs parents, we make the best decisions we can at the time we have to make them. Down the road, we may look back at what we did and perhaps think of how we could have done it better or different. Hindsight is much better than foresight.
In my eyes, you are a great parent and are doing a wonderful job. Emma is a bright happy and I believe a well adjusted. You and Robert are both great parents. Keep on doing the great work you have done so far.